Tinder profile do’s and dont’s

Photo by Emilia Zibaei
Photo by Emilia Zibaei

Yell Tinder, because it’s going down. It’s about time there’s a fair tearing-into for both guys and girls on how weak your Tinder game really is. Your profile was cute for university but you have a LinkedIn now, so its time to up your Tinder profile as well.

Cars

Fellas, I reciprocate how much you enjoy ‘your’ cars—aka random cars you stand in front of in a parking lot, or have rented for your best friend’s wedding. But I doubt it sparks the same interest amongst a potential match. If you are going to include a photo, limit it to just one.

Fish

Gripping a dead fish in your hands … really? What could possibly draw someone in—unless they have a hidden fetish for animal necrophilia in which case, ingenious. Go on a hike, camping, anything but a dead fish.

Clubs

I doubt your potential matches want to see you arms full with your probable one-night stands and a drink spilled down your thigh. Keep it tasteful, lads. However if this has been proven to create a jealous, sexual tension please do share your findings with the rest of us.

Half-nude pics

Ladies, unless you share the unapologetic attitude of Cardi B from which no one can tell you otherwise, consider proportions. Seriously.  If you’re serious about finding your soul mate, you definitely don’t want to start off on the wrong foot. And guys, if you have washboard abs, a picture of it on your profile isn’t necessary. Try to leave something up to the imagination. Unless you’re specifically looking for sex, half-nude pics might not be taken seriously.

Group

This applies to both guys and girls and although it may seem to be common knowledge, some of us still commit this sin. It’s tough on anyone viewing your profile to figure out which one you are, especially if it’s set as your main picture. And I guarantee that you don’t need to prove you have a large social circle.

Quotes

You’ve watched one classic rom-com and all of the sudden feel inclined to have yourself summarized by a singular quote in your bio. It may be a pessimistic foot to lead with, but I highly doubt this is a quote that’ll stick—similar to a poor tattoo, no matter how many ways you force it to be relevant.

Guns

Apparently there is a new craze of pictures of folks shooting guns, whether it’s hunting or at a shooting range. But, there is something very strange about using weapons as a way to get people to want to date you.

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