Sept. 7, 2009

Dear Life:
Thank you for summer. It was a wonderful week. Maybe next year you can try for a bit longer. Thanks.
Sincerely,
Awful Tan

Dear Life:
When is this confounded construction going to end? For the first time I’ve ever experienced, it actually takes more than five minutes to get from point A to point B on campus. What gives? I didn’t come to a small school to walk around mazes of fences.
Sincerely,
Has Sore Feet

Dear Life:
Why am I still awake? I thought I wasn’t supposed to be busy before classes start.
Sincerely,
Co-Curriculars Can be a Bitch

Dear Life:
I would like to remind all of those people out there that allow themselves to fall into a well of self-pity and unhappiness that life is short and precious. It is impossible to overstate the power of a positive outlook and I would like to remind everyone of this. Life is good and the possibilities are endless, go out an enjoy it with a bright smile on your face.
Sincerely,
Unwavering Optimist

Dear Life:
Thanks for forgetting to remind the person next to me on the plane to wear deodourant. It was an awesome five hour flight!
Sincerely,
Row 15, Seat F

Dear Life:
Thank you for allowing me to be born in the late ’80s, so now I’m looking for a job just in time to watch the baby boomer generation get too old to work. No matter how much I screw up my education, I’m practically guaranteed to find a decent job in the next five to ten years.
Sincerely,
Waiting to Pounce

Dear Life:
Can you please stop all my old friends from high school from getting pregnant and having kids? It’s starting to creep me out a little bit.
Sincerely,
Doesn’t Want Children

Dear Life:
Do I really have to go to Africa or Europe or Thailand after I graduate? I know I’m supposed to go “see the world,” but I really just want to sit on my ass and watch TV.
Sincerely,
Couch Potato

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