Dear life: September 19, 2012

Dear Life is your opportunity to write a letter to your life, allowing you to vent your anger with life’s little frustrations in a completely public forum.

All submissions to Dear Life are anonymous, should be no longer than 100 words and must be addressed to your life. Submissions can be sent to dearlife@thecord.ca no later than Monday at noon each week.

Dear Life,
Blue skies during the day… It’s gonna be a good day.
Sincerely,
Weather you believe it or not

Dear Life,
Amused?
Sincerely,
Not laughing

Dear Life,
Mr Gorbachev, tear down this wall.
Signed,
Ronald Reagan

Dear Life,
It takes longer to get into the bookstore than Phil’s.
Sincerely,
Phil’s is cheaper.

Dear Life,
Love is not a victory march.
Sincerely,
Je€€ Buckley

Dear Life,
You take away the DH. C-Spot microwave doesn’t work. Silly library cafe closes early all the time. WHERE DO I MICROWAVE MY FOOD?!?
Sincerely,
Starving student

Dear Life,
Dear BBA, don’t put 70 students in a classroom meant for 60, sitting on the floor and sharing desks is for elementary school.
Sincerely,
Waiting for the best business school to be built

Dear Laurier,
Why are all the first years you admitted so attractive?
Sincerely,
Upper-year student who is not allowed to look

Dear UW students living at 203 Lester,
I€f UW students are so smart, why do they get out€€ at the first floor only to walk down a flight o€f stairs? IT DOESN’T SAVE YOU ANY TIME, THE ONLY REASON IT SEEMS SO IS BECAUSE YOU MAKE ME WAIT AN EXTRA TEN SECONDS TO GET DOWN TO THE GROUND LEVEL.
Sincerely,
Thank God I chose UW as my home campus

Dear Life,
I’m sick and tired of€ everyone always complaining about meaningless shit. Shitty friends? Get rid o€f them. Don’t like the dining hall? Don’t go there. Don’t like the line at the Bookstore? Wait two weeks. Don’t like the “don’t walk on the hawk” tradition? GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE FNCC.
Sincerely,
Grow up and complain to someone who cares

Dear Life,
To the dude pulling his adorable chocolate lab in little a wagon. You literally made me LOL.
Sincerely,
Man’s best friend

Dear Life,
How many times can you really kick a person when they’re down? Honestly. First I had a cousin (my age) commit suicide, then I fell into a dark depression. I started feeling better, then another cousin died. I’m feeling just as shitty and my family is absolutely crushed. Then I get really sick, then I just stress out, and now that my life is starting to feel SOME WHAT normal, I get dumped.
Sincerely,
What next?!

Dear Life,
I need a stronger dose of€ Viagra.
Sincerely,
Down goes the lever when I see the beaver

Dear Life,
Is every poster at the poster sale actually meant for douche bags? Or am I just getting old?
Sincerely,
Entourage posters are still a thing? Really?

Dear Life,
I got this SICK poster o€f Ari Gold, bro.
Sincerely,
Let’s hug it out bitch

Dear Life,
Ugh, granny smith?!
Sincerely,
Apple/Burger King aficionado

Dear Life,
Wub, wub, wub, wub.
Sincerely,
Dubstep

Dear Life,
The Cord’s on CTV? What the fuck?
Sincerely,
Open your fucking eyes, Fauteux