Sept. 30, 2009

Dear Life:
Why does the schedule for the southbound bus stop at King and University no longer exist? How am I supposed to get anywhere on time?
Sincerely,
Screw the Environment, I’m Buying a Car

Dear Life:
How come I keep finding awesome music online that I can’t even download off of iTunes? Join the 21st century already.
Sincerely,
Alright, So Maybe I’m a Hipster

Dear Life:
Why do girls insist on teasing their hair to the point where they look like Marge Simpson? I can’t see the PowerPoint in class anymore.
Sincerely,
Bump-its Are Not Cool

Dear Life:
Sweatpants are not acceptable to wear in public at any time of day, every day of the week. That is all.
Sincerely,
Buy Some Real Pants

Dear Life:
Why does garbage collection have to be so loud and take place so early in the morning?
Sincerely,
I’m Trying to Sleep

Dear Life:
Why is it so difficult for the workers at the Pita Shack to make a pita that doesn’t fall apart?
Sincerely,
Not a Fan of the Terrace

Dear Life:
Tim Horton’s charges you for different sizes of tea. What the hell? It’s just hot water.
Sincerely,
Out 10 Cents

Dear Life:
Laurier students used to be attractive. What happened?
Sincerely,
Am I Ugly Too?

Dear Life:
I would greatly appreciate it if people would stop telling me when they have to pee. I don’t need to know.
Sincerely,
Grossed Out

Dear Life:
An elevator full of people called me out today on taking the DAWB elevator up one floor. To those of you who tried to call me out, I don’t know if you noticed, but I was limping. My toe is broken. Forgive me for taking the elevator to spare the horrid of climbing up stairs. Jerks.
Sincerely,
Broken Toe

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