Dear life: October 11, 2012

Dear Kelly,
Will you marry me … cause racing.
Sincerely,
Reezy

Dear Life,
Why is it that I’m forced to sit in a language tutorial for 50 minutes with a tutorial leader who knows no more about the language I’m learning than I do.
Sincerely,
Sprechen sie Deutsch? Nah, didn’t think so.

Dear Life,
Why did academic advising tell me that I was ”jumping ship” on my university career by deciding to get a 3 year general arts degree?
Sincerely,
It’s not like I was gonna find a job with an honors anthropology degree anyway.

Dear Life,
Is best in Euro
Sincerely,
Bro

Dear Life,
I’ve noticed recently that people who ride horses kind of look like horses themselves! Or alpacas.…
Sincerely,
The casual observer

Dear Life,
I forgot my cell phone and iPod in the women’s washroom off the concourse Tuesday night, and went back eight minutes later to collect them when I noticed them to be missing. Thank you to the wonderful lady who returned them to Special Constable Services!! I only wish there were more thoughtful people like you!
Sincerely,
One Relieved Student

Dear Life,
To the First Year who drew on my face at FYCE-T’s epic event Return To The O: you’re doing it wrong.
Sincerely,
I’m not your breaker.

Dear I do not pay tuition to view your bird’s nest
I would not consider a lack of doing my hair as a sign of laziness. Some of us girls have better things to do with their time like studying, rather than spend 20 minutes to an hour to do our hair. If one of us girls  is blocking your view in lecture, come to class earlier and sit closer to the front.
Sincerly, I love my bird’s nest

Dear Laurier,
Thanks for supporting the Queer community during Queer Awareness Week. Your participation in our events, especially the parade was awesome.
Sincerely,
See you at Trans* Awareness Week.

Dear Editor-in-Chief,
I am alone in bed, naked and yearning for you.
Sincerely,
Join me, I’ve got toys

Dear Life,
I would like to share that in my almost four and a half years at WLU, I have not once stepped foot inside Wilf’s. Do I get a prize for this? Maybe a gift card?
Sincerely,
Wilf’s virgin and proud

Dear Life,
I have a sneaking suspicion that this group of ten loud students hanging out in the private GRADUATE study space in the library are in fact undergraduates.
Sincerely,
Security?

Dear Life,
So I’m studying at Williams’ and this couple comes in. They buy drinks and then they both play games on their iPhones for the next half-hour. Without speaking.
Sincerely,
Texting you instead of speaking to you totally gets me hot too

Dear Life,
Ever notice how all the best films of the past 100 years have one thing in common? Sinbad.
Sincerely,
I hope he’s wearing something made out of windbreaker

Dear whoever planned the construction on James Street,
FUCK YOU.
Sincerely,
Who the fuck thought that was a good idea on a tiny, fucking dead-end street

Dear Life,
Ohhhh.
Sincerely,
David Yoon

Dear show me some diversity,
You say Cord staff only interviews their friends? Joke’s on you, they don’t have friends.
Sincerely,
The Boss

Dear Life is your opportunity to write a letter to your life, allowing you to vent your anger with life’s little frustrations in a completely public forum. All submissions to Dear Life are anonymous, should be no longer than 100 words and must be addressed to your life. Submissions can be sent to dearlife@thecord.ca no later than Monday at noon each week.