Oct. 20, 2010

Dear Life,

Do you ever feel like you are at school in North Korea? People always yell at me for walking on the hawk. Think about it, the hawk is the statue of Kim Jong-il and the people that yell at you are like Kim Jong-il death squads. Do you think it is a coincidence that WLUSU put up a TV in the terrace that is constantly displaying propaganda?

Sincerely,
I didn’t know that Waterloo was in the USSR

Dear Life,

Gadzooks! Why the ragpicker is Pizza Pizza always out of chocolate milk! Curse them and their poor inventory management skills! Dost thou not knowest of thy inferior product! Zounds! The sweet cocoa milk not knowest a purer form then to wash the rubber cheese taste down my throat. For art thou making not the food of God’s, but thy food of the common guttersnipe.

Sincerely,
Get your shit together, fuck heads

Dear Life,

Why the hell would a teacher create a midterm that is next to impossible to finish within the time given? Seriously, a 100 mark test in 45 minutes. Are we expected to write essays for each of the 7 arbitrary questions worth between 8-20 marks each? We are not robots, and this is not fair. You cannot set students up to fail, especially when we attend all classes, take detailed lecture notes, read assigned readings, and studied for at LEAST 10 hours total.
And not only did you set this unattainable standard, but you were YELLING at the students about the instructions, treating us like idiots, and I swear you almost made one girl cry. It’s ridiculous and should not be allowed. It is unjust to students, and even ironic considering it is an ETHICS class. I thought teachers wanted us to have fair opportunity to succeed?
I don’t care if you are a doctor or professor. It gives you no right to lord it over us and let the power get to your head. When it comes out that everyone almost failed this test, it won’t be because it is a hard course and they didn’t study, it will be because you are ignorant and inconsiderate and not a very good teacher.

Sincerely,
There should be a service to help students object to these injustices

Dear Life,

LSPIRG blows.

Sincerely,
I opted out

Dear Life,

Why are people so addicted to their blackberries? There are better, more important things in life than BBM-ing your friend who you will probably see that same day anyway. Detach yourselves from these awful materialistic things and maybe start paying attention in class.

Sincerely,
I refuse to get BBM

Dear Life,

Can Laurier maybe get teachers who can clearly speak English, or get a translator to talk on behalf of them.

Sincerely,
I didn’t realize when I signed up for a Math course, I was taking a second language as well

Dear Life,

I fucking hate studying for midterms. I’m going to Wilf’s instead.

Sincerely,
All you can eat perogies > Gene mapping

Dear Life,

I do not agree with the way things went last year during the presidency election. First off, where the hell are the final results from last year? They haven’t even fucking been posted. How can we, the students, trust WLUSU when they spend our money like it grows on trees. Not every student is a millionaire with a trust fund. Lots of us could use an extra couple of bucks a week. Their fiscal policies make them a disappointment to the student body.

Sincerely,
STOP WASTING OUR MONEY!!!

Dear Life,

The girl who commutes to school and walked around campus for an hour to find a place to sit just to find everywhere full and ended up sitting in her car alone . . . that’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard :(

Sincerely,
You can have my seat :)

Dear Life,

I sincerely doubt that the few people who get 50% discounts with WLUSU are responsible for the rising cost of food. In fact, chances are the prices are so jacked up that food services is still making a profit off them. If you don’t want to spend money on campus food, then don’t. Stop whining and get a job that provides you with some sort of discount. Or, bring a lunch to school and warm it up in the microwaves provided to you so nicely by WLUSU.

Sincerely,
Tired with WLUSU employees taking all the crap

Dear Life,

I fear this person may be right. Look at their credentials; they’ll be starting school at the Eaton Centre soon.

Sincerely,
Fashion is about choice, if you don’t agree with what you see on other people shut the fuck up and take pride in the fact that you feel good about what you yourself are wearing

Dear Life,

I hate it when people walk into my room just to fart, then proceed to leave my room and their fart(s) behind. People fart, I get that, but it’s different when you eat a brick of moldy cheese and a Big Mac then shit your pants in my room minutes later. My advice to you: it’s gross, cut it out, because when you wake up one morning with pink eye I’ll be the one laughing.

Sincerely,
Rant of the week

Comments are closed.