Nov. 10, 2010

Dear Life,

I am 21 years old and the only thing I am confident about is when somebody says, Dude? Smell my fingers! You should politely say, No thank you!

Sincerely,

Not funny enough for you
P.S. If I ever tell you that the cake smells funny at a birthday… You should definitely lean in for a sniff

Dear Life,

TV screens no one looks at? How about more courses. A costly terrace expansion? How about more study space. Services turning into “clubs”? How about financially supporting the groups that make a difference in peoples’ lives. But no, the school “has no money” so the students pay EXTRA just to keep the community pool open. I take pride in what my schools’ campus looks like, but it’s far less important than the academic experience. Stop blowing our fucking money.

Sincerely,

That flashy LED screen isn’t teaching me anything

Dear Life,

Why do people still attempt to study in the Concourse on Sundays? By now you should have realized that we are there dancing every sunday so go move somewhere else on those days if you don’t want to hear us. Deal with it.

Sincerely,

Your just jealous cuz you can’t dance

Dear Life,

Is it just me or has the A-Team, once again, dropped the ball. It appears that they just realized it’s November and they’ve failed to organize anything up until now so they grabbed the first artist they found was available. I mean Kardinal Offishall? Really? Fail A-Team.

Sincerely,

Going to have to pay to go to Toronto to see a real performer

Dear Life,

Despite understanding the purpose of Dear Life articles, I fail to understand why individuals at an educational institution choose to bitch, bitch, bitch rather than seek a solution. Problem: The Concourse is noisy on Sundays. This is due to dedicated volunteers dancing for charity who in fact do not have an alternative place to practise. Solution: Get some exercise and walk two more feet to the library, I hear it’s quieter there to accomodate your ideal work environment.

Sincerely,

It’s really a lot easier than you think!

Dear Life,

In response to “This is a University, not a playground” and “So you think you can dance… Don’t” Since when did the Concourse become a strict study space? I’m pretty sure you have the library for that or even the Solarium. The dance program you didn’t even bother to acknowledge is called Fashion n’ Motion and they have been using the Concourse to practice in for years. They may not be professional dancers but they have tons of passion and could probably dance circles around you. So either put your headphones in and shut up or move your ass to a place that is designated for studying.

Sincerely,

Dancing in the Concourse

Dear Life,

Why is it that when you walk into the Dining Hall you feel like you’re walking into the opening ceremonies at the fucking olympics? I didn’t realize my tuition was paying for a bunch of flags.

Sincerely,

Vancouver 2010 is over, figure it out

Dear Life,

You would think by 2010, a university would have high speed internet access. But no, we are stuck with dial up. What, you mean the internet at Laurier isn’t dial up? No, that can’t be … ten years ago I had faster internet speeds on my Windows 98 with dial up. Every day I try to connect and then question why I bother. Sure, I know there are a lot of people trying to go on Facebook during their lectures, but how about some faster internet for those who attempt to use it for educational purposes.

Sincerely,

If this doesn’t get published that’s fine; I’ll have a different rant for every week until it does

Dear Life,

Every Sunday in the Concourse some lame ass dance crew invades and annoys the hell out of everyone. Your dancers are off beat, out of step and boring to watch; not to mention your dance moves are cliche and novice at best. Also, why is Katy Perry the best dance music you got? God! Please stop annoying everyone trying to study and take Canada’s worst dance crew somewhere else.

Sincerely,

Don’t quit your day job