Dear Life: September 22, 2010

Dear Life,

What is the logic in having a fire drill on a morning while it’s pouring rain? I walked around damp and miserable for the rest of the day. But at least we have hand dryers to help my clothes look presentable… yeah right!

Sincerely,
Soaked and Sick

Dear Life,

Why do people still hate Kanye West? He stole Taylor Swift’s microphone, not her virginity. Aziz Ansari said it best when he introduced Kanye at the VMAs: “I don’t know what everyone’s so mad about. That sounds hilarious!”

Sincerely,
Let’s Have a Toast for Douchebags

Dear Life,

I’m tired of posers in the gym who think that because they have a massive chest and little chicken legs they know more than everyone else in the gym.

Sincerely,
Someone who knows their shit

Dear Life,

To those who refuse to respect the tradition of paying homage to The Hawk by taking the two seconds to walk around it in the Hall of Fame: suck it up. At least you’re not a Badger. I’d rather have too much school spirit than none at all.

Sincerely,
It’s Great to Be a Laurier Golden Hawk!

Dear Life,

I know this has been addressed many times before but it seems the female sex has not learned their lesson. Leggings are not pants. I don’t want to see your frumpy butt, your perky butt, or any butt for that matter in that much detail. If you can’t find comfortable jeans to be stylish then just wear sweatpants like the rest of us.

Sincerely,
I Don’t Need to See your Borders and Boundaries

Dear Life,

To everyone with an iPod: If I can hear your music from the other end of the bus, you are currently making yourself deaf. You are also annoying everyone around you. If you don’t think this applies to you, it probably does. 9/10 people listening to iPods are inflicting their poor taste in music upon everyone around them. Please stop. No, really.

Sincerely,
Turn your music down

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