Lil Wayne avoids prison (for now) with poor dental hygiene
Lil Wayne had his one-year prison sentence postponed as a result of emergency dental surgery.
The rapper, who was supposed to serve his sentence starting Feb. 9, received eight root canals and had his $150, 000 diamond-encrusted “grills” fixed up during an eight hour procedure last week.
Wayne was sentenced to jail on weapons charges last year stemming from being caught with a loaded pistol in 2007.
Felons everywhere have stopped brushing their teeth in hopes of avoiding payment of their debt to society. Candy consumption among gun-toting rappers has also increased substantially.
–Mike Lakusiak
LMFAO rapper fights politician on plane
Skyler “Sky Blu” Gordy, one half of “electro-hop” group LMFAO, claimed to have punched potential 2012 U.S. republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney during an altercation on a flight from Vancouver to Los Angeles last week.
According to Gordy, he was “condor gripped” by Romney after reclining his seat into the former governor of Massachusetts. He responded with a punch to the face. Romney didn’t not retaliate but did not laugh his ass off either.
–Mike Lakusiak
Sean Penn charged with battery for kicking paparazzi
Two-time Academy Award-winner Sean Penn was charged on Friday with misdemeanour battery and vandalism resulting from an incident in October when he kicked a photographer several times and broke his camera.
Penn faces up to 18 months in prison if convicted. He spent 60 days in jail for punching a photographer in 1987 while already on probation for beating up a musician who attempted to make out with his then-wife Madonna.
Penn is set to go before a court in March, which will determine if he will be going up the Mystic River for a year and a half.
–Mike Lakusiak
