You know what yanks my Cord…

…that special time of year: Christmas songs on the radio; Starbucks selling the Holiday Blend among other festive drinks; commercials already on TV advertising gifts for loved ones. No, it is not the week before Christmas, it’s Nov. 1 and it’s almost 15 degrees outside.

Each passing year, the Christmas season gets longer and longer. Stores pack up the Halloween candy and put out Christmas decorations. We can’t get past Remembrance Day before children start pestering their parents about what they want for Christmas.

Now, I understand that I am perhaps a bitter person and a bit of a scrooge during the run up to Christmas. But seriously people, must we stretch Christmas into a two-month marathon?

Let’s face it, the true meaning of Christmas is pretty much dead in this secular society of ours. Not being a religious person, I don’t mind that at all. But it is now not much more than a grotesque display of unrestrained materialism, spending money people largely don’t even have. Each holiday season more and more people will be practically owned by Visa and MasterCard. Merry Christmas.

I’m all for capitalism and for allowing people to make stupid decisions, but we don’t need to celebrate this spectacle with the same ten damn songs on loop everywhere all the time until my ears bleed. I spent my high school years working retail at Canadian Tire, including the holidays; by the end of December had I run into a caroller I probably would have went all Chevy Chase on them like in “Christmas Vacation.”

I know some will scoff and wonder where my Christmas cheer is. It was slowly fading over the years until it was guillotined in the aisles of the power tools department of Canadian Tire. I know I am not alone in my frustrations. So for the sake of the sanity of those of us that would like to enjoy the fall season without the urge to drop-kick the closest shopping-mall Santa, you know where you can cram your holiday spirit.