Finding consistent happiness when multiple aspects of your life are uncertain can be challenging at times, especially during your time in university.
Iโve changed my mind about what it is I want to do with my life after Iโm finished school too many times to count and spent more time than Iโd like to admit panicking about the unpredictability of my future.
No matter how many ducks you have in a row or how organized you are, moving closer towards the world beyond university can be a daunting task.
Our time in school is typically spent teetering on a delicate balance between making sure weโre having the best time of our lives and doing all of the โrightโ things in order to properly succeed.
Wasting my time with trivial activities that I donโt really enjoy doing or putting more unnecessary points on my to-do list and calendar that simply donโt give my existence any added value, is something that Iโve been conflicted with since first-year.
Weโre expected to have it all figured out and be picture perfect visions of adulthood by the time we move on from school, and that kind of pressure can be one of the most all consuming stressors we have during our four (or more) years here.
Regardless of how long itโs taken me to get to this point right now, Iโm happy with where I am and what Iโm doing. Iโm happy to know the people that I do and what Iโm working towards.
Iโve slowly began to recognize the difference between the things that truly make me unhappy and arenโt worth my commitment, versus the things that push me outside of my comfort zone just enough so that Iโm a better human being because of it.
Many aspects about where I am right now terrify me, stress me out and sometimes make me question all of my choices as Iโm doing them. But Iโve realized that my happiness doesnโt have to be so fundamentally rooted in knowing all of the answers right now.
As someone who has typically done things because I felt like I โhadโ to, itโs been a challenge realizing that I donโt have to do anything that I donโt actually want to do.
ย ย Itโs almost scarier when you realize that you are in complete control of the choices you make and where they will lead you, because it means that you have to think critically about what it is youโre doing and why youโre doing it.
At the end of the day, I do enjoy being in university for the academics, experiences and the opportunities itโs given me โ thatโs why Iโm here. Iโm pursuing the path I want to, while actively thinking about where itโs going to take me in the long run.
I just turned 23, a number that makes me feel like a clock is starting to tick down with how much time I have left to accomplish what I want to in order to achieve my ultimate vision of happiness โ even if I donโt really have a firm grasp on what that is yet.
Regardless of how long itโs taken me to get to this point right now, Iโm happy with where I am and what Iโm doing. Iโm happy to know the people that I do and what Iโm working towards.
I may be a little older than the average fourth-year, but Iโm not going to waste my days with too many internal debates about what I should and shouldnโt be doing. Learning to accept the sometimes unexpected nature of things in life can be the best thing for you.
Just look at it this way, in the terribly underrated Pixar prequel Monsters University, Mike Wazowskiโs dreams of becoming a scarer are eventually achieved through unforeseen experiences and he ends up happier and more successful because of it. If thatโs not a model for success, I donโt know what is.
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